Like every other day I was catching up with news on facebook and happened to click a video shared by a friend. I'm hearing the words while reading e-mails and this particular line just catches my attention. It says to do something you're afraid of everyday.
Suddenly, I am taken back to a conversation I had maybe a week earlier with another friend. We were discussing my 'single' status and issues around finding the right partner. He told me that there was a fear I was carrying within me that kept creating these so called issues. At that point I looked at him funny. I couldn't think of anything I'm fearful of. I kept scratching my head for answers. For a couple of days I went around saying "I'm fearful of........" trying to complete that sentence but just couldn't.
Then again, almost as if the universe was conspiring to make me aware of what I'm most fearful of, I get an e-mail that talks about taking risks. It said "The person who risks nothing also does nothing, has nothing, is nothing. If we avoid risk we may avoid suffering and sorrow, but we simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love or live."
This time I thought to myself, I really must try to figure this one out. Within a month I've had 3-4 different sources talking to me directly and indirectly telling me that I must face my fears. Since I wasn't getting anywhere, I decided to start making a list.
1. Animals.... No surprises there.
2. Unknown waters... (too much of Hollywood....;))
3. Horror movies, including the likes of Supernatural and all Vampire series.
4. Rodents..... oh wait...that's included in animals...
Then almost as if a bulb was flicked.... I almost caught myself automatically writing the next one....
Acceptance...!
I'm thinking to myself...."Really...! Acceptance?"
Then I look around me. I hear so many girls being told ..."don't put on weight, you won't find a good guy..." "don't go out in the sun and get a tan, you won't find a good guy"..."don't speak so much of your mind, your to be in laws may not like it"...."don't get too independent, your husband may feel threatened"..... you see a pattern there....... I think (in some cases) from the moment a girl hits puberty she is being told directly or indirectly that she is not good enough the way she is. She needs to change. There is no acceptance....!!!!
(don't get me wrong... there's plenty of exceptions. I'm just talking about the majority based on my personal encounters)
Of course, then acceptance is what I'm afraid of the most when considering a prospective relationship.
What now?
Going back to the point that started it all..... doing something I'm afraid of most everyday..... I'm all set to go ahead and deal with this one too....!
I'm thinking I'll skip my fear of unknown waters..... that would be like just dishing myself up for crocodiles, sharks, anaconda's etc starving for a delicious meal... :P
As far as horror movies/series go - I'm watching Supernatural as I write this... so I've technically done my one thing I fear for the day...... !
....and now for a sweet sleep having discovered something new about me...!
Suddenly, I am taken back to a conversation I had maybe a week earlier with another friend. We were discussing my 'single' status and issues around finding the right partner. He told me that there was a fear I was carrying within me that kept creating these so called issues. At that point I looked at him funny. I couldn't think of anything I'm fearful of. I kept scratching my head for answers. For a couple of days I went around saying "I'm fearful of........" trying to complete that sentence but just couldn't.
Then again, almost as if the universe was conspiring to make me aware of what I'm most fearful of, I get an e-mail that talks about taking risks. It said "The person who risks nothing also does nothing, has nothing, is nothing. If we avoid risk we may avoid suffering and sorrow, but we simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, love or live."
This time I thought to myself, I really must try to figure this one out. Within a month I've had 3-4 different sources talking to me directly and indirectly telling me that I must face my fears. Since I wasn't getting anywhere, I decided to start making a list.
1. Animals.... No surprises there.
2. Unknown waters... (too much of Hollywood....;))
3. Horror movies, including the likes of Supernatural and all Vampire series.
4. Rodents..... oh wait...that's included in animals...
Then almost as if a bulb was flicked.... I almost caught myself automatically writing the next one....
Acceptance...!
I'm thinking to myself...."Really...! Acceptance?"
Then I look around me. I hear so many girls being told ..."don't put on weight, you won't find a good guy..." "don't go out in the sun and get a tan, you won't find a good guy"..."don't speak so much of your mind, your to be in laws may not like it"...."don't get too independent, your husband may feel threatened"..... you see a pattern there....... I think (in some cases) from the moment a girl hits puberty she is being told directly or indirectly that she is not good enough the way she is. She needs to change. There is no acceptance....!!!!
(don't get me wrong... there's plenty of exceptions. I'm just talking about the majority based on my personal encounters)
Of course, then acceptance is what I'm afraid of the most when considering a prospective relationship.
What now?
Going back to the point that started it all..... doing something I'm afraid of most everyday..... I'm all set to go ahead and deal with this one too....!
I'm thinking I'll skip my fear of unknown waters..... that would be like just dishing myself up for crocodiles, sharks, anaconda's etc starving for a delicious meal... :P
As far as horror movies/series go - I'm watching Supernatural as I write this... so I've technically done my one thing I fear for the day...... !
....and now for a sweet sleep having discovered something new about me...!
