I'm beautiful and I know it... :)

There's a thought that's been chewing my brain for some time now and I thought its unfair that my brain suffers alone. So here's some for your brain too... :P

Having an accurate estimation of yourself is a good thing, right? Its basically knowing your positives as well as your negatives. This allows you to change, improve and grow into the person you want to be. Why then is it so difficult for people to accept positives about themselves and just as easy to accept the negatives?

Ever noticed how when you tell someone something negative about themselves more often than not they will accept it and even confirm it. I guess they too see it as a negative in themselves. They do it easily and there's no fuss or arguing trying to prove that it is indeed a negative. Don't believe me? Try telling someone they've put on weight. See what you get. Don't be shy to share the responses you get. I'll be happy if I'm wrong.

Now, try complimenting someone about something you believe to be really great about them. Most likely that person is going to reject that compliment or just shrug it off with a thanks or say something like "now you're just being nice, etc." There's no real acceptance or confirmation like with the negative.

Did you try it for yourself?

Why is it so damn hard for people to confirm their positive attributes or achievements when complimented about the same?

Can you imagine someone telling Roger Federer that he's the greatest tennis player ever and him replying with two simple words, "I know." I have never heard him say that.

You know it. I know it. His opponents know it. His achievements speak for themselves. Why then have I never heard him accept that? Its not like he's over exaggerating his achievements. Just an accurate estimation of himself, I'd say.

Or for that matter if someone told me I'm beautiful and for me to reply with the same, "I know." Beauty, after all is very subjective so my estimation is the right estimation. If I said, "I know" I'd probably make eyes roll. Actually, let me correct that. I have said that and made eyes roll. I've been told things like, "that's very humble of you" or "how modest!" etc. The people who matter know that I still have my feet firmly planted on the ground. 

It pains me when I compliment someone and they try to play down their achievements. When they are not confident in themselves. Why are we so obsessed with trying to act modest? If there's something extraordinary about you why are you still expected to act in moderation? I don't get it. I say screw it. Everyone appreciates confidence. Be confident in yourself. If you believe you're the most beautiful person on this planet, you are...!!!

Always remember, the people who are trying to bring you down are already beneath you.

Waist, wallet or.......?

What a deal breaker..! I thought I'd have 10 hours of shopping exercise again. Turns out the shops didn't care as much about the moolah as they did about celebrating and so they shut early. Oh well, I still got a good enough dose of exercise for the day.

Shamefully got to admit that I missed the parade today. Didn't know the street or time (downside of being new to the city) and so by the time I reached the show was over.. :(

As far as food and diet is concerned I still have to practice sharing or ordering kids meals. Got sucked into ordering a separate meal only because I'm a sucker for variety. But I managed breakfast and dinner with a home-cooked meal. That by my standards is an excellent effort considering I'm on holidays. That deserves a celebration and in anticipation of this good effort I already bought myself a new pair of shoes... ;)

See what I've done there? I've steered away from rewarding myself with food and wine and moved to greener pastures like retail therapy. I reckon better on the credit card than on the waist. There's only one little problem though. I'll have hatch a scheme that ensures constant flow of funds..... God..! So much to do and only one lifetime to do it all...!!!!

While I try to accomplish so many things bit by bit I'd really like to know what are some of the things you reward yourself with when you cross over little self-placed hurdles. Hopefully they'll help maintain my waistline and be easy on the wallet too.

Happy 4th of July everyone......:)

Lifelong commitment!

Falling off and getting back on track to my weight loss goals is become a regular thing now. I'm not really proud about getting off track and so this time I'm not going to talk about how good it feels getting back on track. I'll wait till a considerable amount of time passes staying on track and then maybe explore that topic.

I will however mention that I slept determined to wake up early and go for my morning walk and I did just that. Most pleasant walk I've enjoyed in quite some time. So quiet. Absolutely no traffic. No Noise. That's two types of pollutants I didn't have to worry about. The sun was just the right amount warm and it was just perfect. While walking I had many thoughts running through my mind. My travel plans while I'm here. Shopping list. Gifts for my family I'm going to buy. My weight loss goals. The buck stopped there. I started to come up with strategies on how I intend to achieve that.

Just while my mind was busy doing that I saw a few people come towards me. They came closer and I saw a little girl on her bike, her older brother and their mum were jogging along side her. They both had their earphones plugged in listening to their favourite tracks. They passed me and we greeted each other and continued along our ways.

As we crossed each other I found myself thinking about what kind of life I'd like to have when I have a family of my own. I realised that all this focus on fitness doesn't stop at me achieving my weight loss goals. It is a lifelong thing. If I want to enjoy an active lifestyle when I have kids, run around with them playing games and teaching them the importance of staying fit for a healthier life I'll have to live it everyday. Yes, I've heard the part about making fitness a lifelong decision before and apparently when you accept that you stop thinking about being "on track" and "off track." You automatically are always on track (Hope I haven't lost you) 

I guess that concept just hit me with exceptional clarity today. So here I am ready to raise a toast to new depths of understanding and hope to make fitness a part of life. Now if you excuse me its bed time and I want to be up early 'cause another 10 hours of cardio await me tomorrow. What? didn't get it? Its the 4th of July tomorrow which means a mega sale here in the USA..... So... Good night...... I need all the rest I can get tonight.

Lost count on what day it is ..... :P

I think the last three weeks have been nothing short of a roller coaster for me. In between introducing my boyfriend to my family...(which involved a lot of feasting as typical to any Indian family) packing for my holidays and actually traveling I honestly had no time to track my food intake and definitely no time to check in here.

Today, marks a week since my holiday began here in the USA. After a lot of contemplating, I finally decided to face my fear and get on the scales. I had to. Having had some experience in this area before I know that the more I delay it the worst it gets so I just got on. Almost had a mini heart attack but quickly recovered when I realised the scales measured in pounds and not kilograms. Pleasantly surprised. No weight gain. Yay...!

I guess my vacation couldn't have come at a worst time. Here I am, trying to lose weight for an upcoming wedding and given my current environment I'm beginning to feel that maintaining my weight will be a task in itself. During this week I've noticed how everything here is super-sized. A regular coke is served in a jumbo glass. A serve of spaghetti bolognese is enough for four. It even comes with a salad which is a meal by itself. A single serve of ice cream is enough for two. I won't even start with the price difference between a small bag of chips and a family sized one which obviously tempts the buyer to get the bigger one at a cheaper price. With these recent experiences I've decided from now on I'm just going to order a kids meal or share with whoever I'm eating out with. Honestly struggled to finish the meals by myself and ended up getting them doggy-bag'd.

All my favourite foods are easily available. They are cheap and in large quantities. Now I understand why everyone warned me about taking a holiday at this time and the inevitable weight gain that would follow. I'm no less. I've taken it as a personal challenge to not only maintain my weight but also to shed a few kilos before I head back.

The only thing left is to hatch a genius plan on how I'm going to achieve that. I've started with 4-5 hour long walks around different shops every evening. That way I include cardio and weight training when I walk around lifting shopping bags... ;)

If you want to know how that's going, well, you're just going to have to continue reading. I am not going to promise this time about being regular but I will definitely try.

See you tomorrow.

Day 14

In your quest to lose weight in a healthy manner do you often hear things like;

Eat fresh foods
Pick organic
Avoid preservatives so no ready to cook food
No junk food
Go easy on chocolates, ice creams, cakes and colas
.... stuff like that?

It just occurred to me that there was in fact a time when people ate like that. Actually there is a place where people eat like that even today. That place is my home and many other homes, I'm sure.

My mum wakes up and cooks breakfast for the family. Then its lunch time followed by dinner. Even the snacks are prepared at home. Some snacks are prepared in advance but the good thing is they don't contain any preservatives. It doesn't only stop there. She shops for the fruits and vegetables herself so they're all handpicked after a very lengthy process of scouting varied number of vendors. Of course, since I'm home I am always forced to go along more as a designated driver than anything else.

Of course my family can enjoy this luxury because my mum has chosen to stay at home and not go to 'work'. But is she really not working? I think she works more than all of us combined and I can say that because when anyone falls sick things still run smoothly at home. But if mum falls there is complete chaos. Everyone is lost.

Very recently mum wasn't at her best and was prescribed bed rest. That's when I filled in for her and realised just how difficult her life was. Cooking a fresh meal at least 3 times a day. I for one had totally underestimated the work she does. That forced me to think of the lifestyle our ancestors enjoyed. I think they probably had their way of life completely sorted. One partner went to work while the other stayed at the house looking after everything that made it a home. Its more than a full time job. Don't know what changed. If I had to speculate I'd say things changed when everyone started valuing money over all else. (I'd save this argument, Oh! of course I meant discussion ;) for another day)

Getting back to food. It is our basic source of energy. Imagine having a meal that is personally handpicked and freshly prepared every time! Try having that kind of food for a couple of weeks and you may notice the sugar cravings have disappeared. I'm saying this from a place of personal experience. I can't remember the last time I had a craving that needed a fix then and there...

Wow... I sound like I'm almost contemplating a lifestyle change but I'm born in a different time so I will just have to make best of what I have and that means training my husband to cook decent meals when I'm unable to do so..... Ahem! Ahem! Are you listening from where ever you are? ;)

Day 13

Its Monday!!! I said to myself when I woke up. I was so excited. Couldn't wait to get to a scale and check my weight. I had really followed my food and exercise plan. Well, exercise did take a back seat because I hurt my lower back but I still went for walks. Even my granny's friend noticed the weight loss and even complimented me for the same.

I got on the scales and let me tell you they really know how to crush you..... The scale didn't move. I'm sure if the scales were a girl she would've moved by now. I'm convinced the scale is a He..! So insensitive....!!!! Every time I get on I ask myself, When? When? When will my weight really move to the other side. It has come to one point and just refuses to move. I was getting so frustrated and then the lady who was checking my weight looked up at me and said, "Congratulations! That's 2 kg's off."

My eyes just popped out like they do in the cartoons.... I couldn't believe what she was saying. I looked at her and joked, "Were you up late, drinking or something?" She laughed and showed me the record from my previous assessment. There it was in black and white. My weight was 2 kg's higher than today.

I realised then how I had been out traveling and constantly eating out. No exercise and I had no tabs on the junk I was eating. There were parties. I had started baking and tasting. .. :P I remembered then my previous assessment and how sad I was. How disappointed I was with myself for being so careless after all the effort I had put in. It was like a wake up call for me and made me even more determined to get back on track. I guess I conveniently forgot the increased weight because I was just so much in denial.

Ha ha ha... not anymore... I lost the extra.... yay.... **doing a dance**

Thats not the best news. The best news it I lost another 5 inches overall since my previous assessment. That's confirmation enough that I'm doing the right thing.

Ok, time to watch Junior Masterchef..... see you later.

Day 12

It is true... when you are really looking for something the universe will conspire to present itself to you. I haven't been resting the last two days.. :P I have desperately been trying to decide what to write about in this space. You may have already gathered that I'm not a professional at this so at times I'm caught thoughtless or wordless... :)

That's not the case today. I spent almost an hour researching and writing up a piece today around the "no salt diet" but just when I was re-reading I managed to catch the re-play of this weeks episode of Satyamev Jayate and I just had to write about it.

For those who missed, this weeks episode focussed on how our society is not built to accept anyone that is "different". Their focus was more on how the infrastructure in our country doesn't support those that are handicapped. There's a particular segment about a special girl, Disha that caught my attention. She has a condition where her skin doesn't grow with her age. It's far stretched and prone to infections. Sorry I missed the name of her condition but you see her and you know she has a condition. They spoke about how badly people treated her to the extent that a woman even spit on her...! What absolutely got to me was that she is an adopted kid. Her being "different" is what made her special and her current parents decided to adopt her. Her parents knew she needed extra care and love and they decided to adopt her. Totally reaffirmed my faith in the goodness in people.

Also made me think about how stuck we are over petty things like being too fat or too thin. Too fair or too dark. Too tall or too thin. Made me question why are we too stuck with these petty things.

Its obvious isn't it. We feel we are not accepted for who we are. The way we are. Then again, "we" make up the population so let me ask this. Do we really accept others for who they are? The way they are? The kind of acceptance that is forced on us by some sort of law like the discrimination act or equal opportunity act doesn't really count. I mean true acceptance that comes in the form of appreciation for the differences that makes us all unique. Acceptance that creates a willingness to learn from each others' differences and move forward, together. That sort of acceptance.

From my limited experience on this planet, I believe you can only accept the uniqueness in others when you've truly accepted yourself with everything that makes you unique and special.

No, I'm no saint. I too struggle on most days. Most days I'm too quick to judge but I try. I have to because if I dream of a better society I'm going to have to start by being a better person myself.

On that note I better say good night. It's way past my bed time.

See you tomorrow. Night night or Good Morning depending on which part of the globe you're on.